Marriage, The Wife's Part

Wives are you happy with your marriage?   Does it need to be improvements in area's?  This is not about changing what the hubby is doing.   Just let that go.   Let's look at what we are doing as wives & address that.    Let's jump on in to some things to get us thinking what can we do different.  I hope the picture helps you relax as you jump in.

We will be looking at sowing & reaping.  To sow is to put in & to reap is was you get from after you have sown.  Very simple principle that can do great things.    You are doing the sowing & the reaping, not lets see what I can get my hubby to do different.   Ladies, leave the poor guy a lone.   He's got guy stuff to do.  

Look at what you want to have done different, is it more date nights with your hubby, more quality time with him at home, more communication with him or do you feel your not on the same page as him & want to change that?   Whatever your goal is, let's look at what you are doing now that is not getting the results that you want & stop doing them.   Let's look on how you can sow better things to reap better fruit.  When we are applying the sowing & reaping principle, do not look for the fast change. Some times it might take a season or so to get the fruit.   Have patience with yourself & what you are doing.  

Let's look at ourselves some more.  Are you taking care of you?  Eating healthy, exercises, getting out with the lady friends, building into the the family relationships outside of you & him & each other's friends?  Remember the times of dating each other & talking about it!!  Drop old issues, holding on to past pain & rough times kills the future joy.  How many nice loving words have you said towards him in a day?  Holding hands much?  Are you showing him respect?  Have you said thank you to him today?   Stop picking out ever little thing he does that is making you crazy!!  Doing that is killing your relationship.  You would not like it if the shoe was on the other foot.  

If you would like more help with this, please contact me.  Blessings on your path for a stronger, healthier marriage!!

If what I offer here is relevant to you in any way, please consider donating. As I tend to my family (disabled hubby and homeschooled kids) I write in my free time. No knitting here but I love Taco Bell now and then and your donations help keep the spicy food coming. Every donation is appreciated!!!

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Principles

Principles, here are some descriptions from Merriam Webster Dictionary:

principle

• a moral rule or belief that helps you know what is right and wrong and that influences your actions
•  a basic truth or theory : an idea that forms the basis of something
•  a law or fact of nature that explains how something works or why something happens
   

Here is a definition of principle:
1 a : a comprehensive and fundamental law, doctrine, or assumption

b (1) : a rule or code of conduct

(2) : habitual devotion to right principles

• a man of principle

c : the laws or facts of nature underlying the working of an artificial device

2 : a primary source : origin

3 a : an underlying faculty or endowment

• such principles of human nature as greed and curiosity

b : an ingredient (such as a chemical) that exhibits or imparts a characteristic quality

4 capitalized, Christian Science : a divine principle : god

— in principle

: with respect to fundamentals

• prepared to accept the proposition in principle

Principles are your foundation from which you grow from, make decisions from & form your ideas, beliefs & emotions.   What are yours?  Are you living lined up with your principles?  How are your goals in life, are they from your principles?   

Where do you get your principles from?  Is it handed down from your family?  Religious base?  Books you have read?  What you learned from your schooling?  

If what I offer here is relevant to you in any way, please consider donating. As I tend to my family (disabled hubby and homeschooled kids) I write in my free time. No knitting here but I love Taco Bell now and then and your donations help keep the spicy food coming. Every donation is appreciated!!!

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Marriage Part 2

Marriage is difficult if the foundation for it is not laid the proper/correct way.  Marriage is not easy, it's work!  But with the right foundation it can have an easier flow to it.   People ask me,  how I have been married for so long, we pick to be married even when we hit hard times, no matter what the hard times may look like & not being mad at the same time.  But there is much more to it.

Here are some steps that will help the foundation for a healthy marriage:
-Be emotionally mature, mentally mature, spiritually mature & physically mature
-know how to give & receive
-know what your healthy boundaries are & how to respect others boundaries
-know how to respect & give honor
-have self confidence
-communicate 
-leave your parents household (not to have a foot or both feet still there)
-grow into your own person, grow into an adult 
-learn how to be a spouse

Before marriage knowing how to build into a relationship will help build a strong foundation. Think about what kind of a person you want to marry.  What kind of a person do you want to be?  Do you share the same beliefs, morals & values?  What are you bringing to the marriage, good/bad stuff?  Have you meet the family? Do you value what the family think & say?  Do you trust the person you want to marry?  Did you build a relationship with the family?  

If you have some of the foundation built but not all of it, you can still fix it.  Both spouses will need to do the work for the foundation to be strong. 

If what I offer here is relevant to you in any way, please consider donating. As I tend to my family (disabled hubby and homeschooled kids) I write in my free time. No knitting here but I love Taco Bell now and then and your donations help keep the spicy food coming. Every donation is appreciated!!!

Donations are not tax deductible.

Marriage Part 1

Marriage what is it?  After all it is the goal for most people, some are driven to do it.  Some cultures have prearranged marriages. Some folks go to the court house to get hitched, some have large weddings to start their marriage, some have a small wedding & some are done outside at a park, on a boat, on the shore or in a back yard.  All that is not marriage but a ceremony that takes place in front of a pastor, priest or whatever you have for your religious leader, judge, family & friends. 

Marriage is a covenant, that is  between God, man & woman.   Marriage is a relationship between God, man & woman.  Marriage is a family institution rather than church & state.  In Genesis there was only God, Adam & Eve, this was the first marriage.  This was a plan for unity with God.  God created all it, this is where it is started, the foundation.   

Marriage has steps that must happen before marriage happens.  The steps help lay a foundation for marriage.  Marriage is an on going effort by both people involved till the day they die.  Sometimes days marriage is less effort than others that's a given.  Whatever your marriage vows were, you entered in to a covenant that is made to be everlasting.  I'm not here to past judgements on any marriages that may have failed.  That is none of my business. That is between God, the man & the woman.  

There will be more posts on Marriage.  This one is just the start.

If what I offer here is relevant to you in any way, please consider donating. As I tend to my family (disabled hubby and homeschooled kids) I write in my free time. No knitting here but I love Taco Bell now and then and your donations help keep the spicy food coming. Every donation is appreciated!!!

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Does the blessings/curses from the Old Testament apply to us today?

How does the Old Testament Law apply to Christians today?   The past post Adam & Eve, Submit, & Help Meet mix with this.   The Old Testament Law was written for the chosen people of Israel, the Israelite's, not the Gentiles.   

The difference between Israelite's & Gentiles (Christians):  1 Israel was picked for a purpose, see Genesis 12:1-3.  Through them was God's plan to save the world.  Plan was to Jesus coming through from the Jewish race, then dying on the cross to cover man from our sins.  2. Christians are chosen because those who are in Christ by putting their trust in Him & believing who He is.  This is how Christians are to be saved & will have salvation. 

In the Book of Deuteronomy covers the The Covenant made between God & the Israel.   Deuteronomy was the second time the law was given.  The first time was in Exodus, when Moses went up to Mount Sinai.  Moses passed the Law to Joshua before Moses died.  The Covenant was an agreement between God & Israel.  It was not an agreement God made with everyone.  

Christians have a New Covenant with different responsibilities.  The Old Covenant is no longer enforced. It has been replaced for everyone, Jews & Gentiles.  The New Covenant is for everyone who puts their faith in Jesus.   

We are under a New Covenant & must follow it, Love God with every part of you, Love your neighbor as yourself. Key point you must love God first, yourself & then your neighbor.  Remember even your enemies.   

The Old Covenant was based on obeying the laws t receive God's blessing/curses.  The New Covenant is based on grace.  The grace we would not have if Jesus did not come.  The Old Covenant is still in play for everyone to use as a foundation.  The New Covenant commands us to live with moral principles ( the Old Covenant). The Ten Commandments are expressed in some way or another with the moral principles.  See how it is all laying out!!!!   

Make sure you understand all the laws in the Old Testament, for they are the base of moral principles that we all uses as our foundation.  With the foundation laid, keep Jesus as your cornerstone.  

To answer the question that I started with, I feel yes, the blessings/curses apply still today. But with Jesus we have a chance/ Hope/ away!!!

If what I offer here is relevant to you in any way, please consider donating. As I tend to my family (disabled hubby and homeschooled kids) I write in my free time. No knitting here but I love Taco Bell now and then and your donations help keep the spicy food coming. Every donation is appreciated!!!

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Making Sure

Now we got the Elementary Principles, we know what the next step is, let's make sure we are headed in the right direction & how can we tell we are headed in the right direction.   In 2 Peter 1:3-12 helps us with that.
https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=2+peter+1%3A3-12&version=NIV 

 Step 1: we need to have knowledge of Jesus Christ who has called us to his own glory & excellence

Step 2: After step one, we can then be partakers of the divine nature. This really points out that it is not "our call" or "our mission", but we are joining Jesus in his.   For it is all for the glory of God. 

Step 3: We are to continue to added to our faith goodness,  from goodness knowledge & to knowledge ,self-control, from self-control, perseverance,  from perseverance, godliness & to godliness, mutual affection & from mutual affection , love.

 Step 4: Be firmly established in truth.

Possessing these qualities in increasing the measure of them,  these qualities will keep you from being ineffective & unproductive in your knowledge of Jesus Christ.

If what I offer here is relevant to you in any way, please consider donating. As I tend to my family (disabled hubby and homeschooled kids) I write in my free time. No knitting here but I love Taco Bell now and then and your donations help keep the spicy food coming. Every donation is appreciated!!!

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After the Elementary Princples

After the elementary principles we need to move to the next step.  What does the next step look like?
In 1 Peter 4:7-11 gives us what the next step looks like.    
https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1+peter+4%3A7-11&version=NIV

Step 1: self-control & sober-minded, for the sake of your prayers. 

Step 2: keep loving one another, love covers a multitude of sins.

Step 3: show hospitality to one another without grumbling,  
hospitality with a joyful heart.

Step 4: each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, not to build self up.

Step 5: May God be glorified through all that you do.

These look like simple steps.  So why are so many missing it?   It could have been many were stuck at the Elementary Principles & did not know there is a next step.   I hope this help shed more light on it.  

If what I offer here is relevant to you in any way, please consider donating. As I tend to my family (disabled hubby and homeschooled kids) I write in my free time. No knitting here but I love Taco Bell now and then and your donations help keep the spicy food coming. Every donation is appreciated!!!

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Christians are Stuck

Christians need to know the elementary principles which are covered in 1Timothy 5:21 & 
https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1+timothy+5%3A21&version=NIV
then move to be mature Christians as it speaks about in Hebrew 5:12.   Christians are to do that

https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Hebrews+5%3A12&version=NIV
till the day Jesus returns as in Revelation or they die. Keeping what God command us to do,
Matthew 22:37-40. 
https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew+22%3A37-40&version=NIV

The elementary principles are the foundation to being a Christian.  We are to learn them & then build from there & grow to maturity.   Most Christians know the elementary principles that 1 Timothy 5:21 covers. But that is where most Christians get stuck at that level.   We are called to grow to maturity & to help others.  How do we grow, if we don't know we are stuck?  Or do you know you are stuck & want  to grow to maturity & don't know how?

Christians are humans & can become comfortable & move towards convenient. Instead of facing growth & moving towards maturity & helping others.   Some of what holds you back is how you are brought up.  We learn from our parents & the family around us.   They teach us our values/morals/principles.  That is our foundation.  Our parents sculpt the way we think.   

Our parents want what is best for us.  We have to be careful not to move towards stuff that is convenient & comfortable.  That's where we can get stuck.  If you are stuck how do you get unstuck & move towards maturity?

We are not to move away from the  elementary principles, but grow from there.   In Hebrews 6:1-6 lays it out for us.
Hebrews 6:1-6 (NIV)

"Therefore let us move beyond the elementary teachings about Christ and be taken forward to maturity, not laying again the foundation of repentance from acts that lead to death, and of faith in God,  instruction about cleansing rites, the laying on of hands, the resurrection of the dead, and eternal judgment.  And God permitting, we will do so.

 It is impossible for those who have once been enlightened, who have tasted the heavenly gift, who have shared in the Holy Spirit,  who have tasted the goodness of the word of God and the powers of the coming age and who have fallen away, to be brought back to repentance. To their loss they are crucifying the Son of God all over again and subjecting him to public disgrace."   

 We as Christians need to dig deeper to grow deeper to be able to mature as Christians.  We sometimes loose track of the digging deeper to mature & get stuck at the elementary principles.  
Are you ready to move towards maturity? 

If what I offer here is relevant to you in any way, please consider donating. As I tend to my family (disabled hubby and homeschooled kids) I write in my free time. No knitting here but I love Taco Bell now and then and your donations help keep the spicy food coming. Every donation is appreciated!!!

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Help Meet

The posts Adam & Eve/Submit are tied in with this post.   In Genesis 2:18 God made a Help Meet for Adam, which was Eve.  Eve was an opposite of Adam.   God created Eve different from Adam.  Adam was made in the wild, out of dust.  God made Eve in the beautiful garden & from a rib, from Adam.  Eve is the opposite of Adam, that came from Adam.  Eve was spiritual equal to Adam.

God called Eve a Help Meet.    What is a Help Meet?   Is it the same as a Help Mate?    I did some digging.  I hope you do your own too!!  The definitions I have found help shed light on to the verse.  

Help Meet means suitable helper, equal help. One who assist another.    Help Mate is a person who is a companion & helper, that is from the Merriam-Webster Dictionary.   Suitable  from Genesis 2:18 refers to strength, to be strong, fit for.  

Eve was created suitable for Adam.  Adam was to name & tend to the garden. Eve was to be by his side for Adam.   One day in the garden Eve ate from the tree of Good & Evil, as a result of that was cursed.  Part of the curse Adam was to ruler over her.   Eve need to be cared for.  Eve is still to be the help meet for Adam, but with Adam to rule over her.  

If what I offer here is relevant to you in any way, please consider donating. As I tend to my family (disabled hubby and homeschooled kids) I write in my free time. No knitting here but I love Taco Bell now and then and your donations help keep the spicy food coming. Every donation is appreciated!!!

Donations are not tax deductible.

Submit

This post ties in with Adam & Eve post.  In Matthew 26:39,42 shows us how Jesus submitted to God. Jesus trusted God in what God had planned & had for Jesus.   Jesus knew what laid before Him, asked God if there was another way, but He only wanted God's will.   

In Ephesians 5:22, Wives are told to submit to their husbands as to the Lord.  The Geek definition for submit in that verse is "Voluntary attitude of giving in, cooperating, assuming responsibility & carrying a burden".   The wives are not to be in a slave submission, but a voluntary submission.  She gets to pick if she will submit.  It's not just once you get to decide to submit, marriage gives you many chances to submit.   

In Genesis 2:24 Adam & Eve were called  "one flesh" since they were married.   Should one body fight itself? Or should all the working parts work together as a team to get things done.   A team has one captain, to make the final decision.  

This post is not going to talk about what the husband needs to be doing.  It's not going to refer to what if he.....fill in the blank.   This is just referring to the simple word submit & what the Bible as referring to.   Submit has had a negative surrounding it.  

If you are having problems submitting in your life ask yourself a couple of questions, Do you trust him?  Do you respect & honor him?  What are you afraid of?  Once you have the answers there you will be able to move forward.  

Next post will be on the Help Meet. Yes, meet not mate.  

If what I offer here is relevant to you in any way, please consider donating. As I tend to my family (disabled hubby and homeschooled kids) I write in my free time. No knitting here but I love Taco Bell now and then and your donations help keep the spicy food coming. Every donation is appreciated!!!

Donations are not tax deductible.

Adam & Eve

Most of us know the story of Adam & Eve.  For those who don't, it's in the Bible in Genesis.  I have read this many times myself & have had many discussions with other people about it.   I have missed or over looked a simple but powerful verse.   I came across the verse while looking into another subject but the two go together.   As I dug for wisdom & knowledge on the subject matter,  I was lead to start sharing what I found.   I understand that this may upset/offend some or even many.   But before you decide not to read anymore or give me a piece of your mind, read it to the end & read all of it.  Keep in mind there will be many posts on this load subject.  Let's start!!!!!!

The verse that was brought to new light to me was Genesis 3:16.  It's the curse Eve received from God, that was brought on my her own choices.  The first curse is "increased pain in childbearing, with pain you will give birth to children."  The second curse is "your desire will be for your husband & he will rule over you". 

In Genesis God gave dominion over the earth & everything in it to Adam.  God also made Eve as a help meet for Adam, Genesis 2:18.  Make notice it is meet & not mate.  Other post will talk about that in the near future.    

Eve was created to be an equal with Adam.   Because of her choices God then placed Adam above her.   Some may say she was misled by the serpent, that was Eve's plea to God too.  Eve also informed the serpent what God said about the fruit from the trees in the garden. The rules were clear when she made her choice to eat from the tree of  the knowledge of good and evil in the garden.  Adam was aware of the rule also & he made his choice to take the fruit from Eve.    

With the choice that was made by Eve, God placed Adam as the head in their marriage, making them no longer equals.   Yes, at one point in time man & women were 100% equal.  With Adam now the head of the relationship with Eve, he does not have the right to have her be abused in any way.  She is still the gift from God to be his Help Meet.  That is still the same.  

Being the head has lots of responsibilities, it's not a free pass to rule over everything & do what you want to make yourself happy.  God made Adam to take care the earth & everything in it.  Eve fits in that too.  Adam is to take care of Eve.   

Eve is to submit herself to Adam now.  There's the other word that causes a lot of feathers to be ruffled.  Submit!!!!  Yes, I said it.    Submit has had a lot of negative attached to it.   I will have a near future post on that.    

I want to encourage everyone to do their own digging on these subject matters.  Don't just take my word for it.   Happy Digging!!!!

If what I offer here is relevant to you in any way, please consider donating. As I tend to my family (disabled hubby and homeschooled kids) I write in my free time. No knitting here but I love Taco Bell now and then and your donations help keep the spicy food coming. Every donation is appreciated!!!

Donations are not tax deductible.